By Muscle Media
Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities mount up, we sometimes think that “I wish I were somebody else.” You wish you can improve yourself. For some reason, we mistakenly believe that most people are better than we are. In reality, most people are more envious of us than we are of them.
You may spot an eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party. She’s casually sipping on a glass of Asti Spumante. You may think to yourself, “she looks so perfectly calm and confident.” But if you could read her mind, you would see surprisingly clouded thoughts. You might be amazed that she’s thinking “people talking about me and why I’m seated here alone. Why don’t guys find me attractive? …I’m too fat… I wish I was as smart as my best friend.”
We may look at a young business entrepreneur and say “Woah… what else could he ask for?” But he stares at the mirror and murmur to himself, “I hate my big eyes… I wonder why people won’t talk to me… I hope mom and dad can still work things out.”
Isn’t it funny? We look at other people and envy them for looking so outrageously perfect. Sometimes we wish that we could trade places with them. The irony is that they are looking at us and thinking the same thing. It seems that we’re all insecure of each other! We may suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope of any self-improvement. You may notice that you have an irritating habit like biting your finger nails, and you are the last to know. We may be cloaked in quiet desperation.
I have a friend who never seems to get tired of talking. In most conversations, she’s the only one who seems interested in the things she has to say. So, our other friends tend to avoid her. She doesn’t notice how she has become socially handicapped by gradually affecting those around her.
Steps for improve yourself
One of the first steps to self-improvement is to talk and then truly listen to a trusted friend. Find someone who you are comfortable opening up with. Ask questions like “Do you think I’m ill-mannered?”, “Do I always sound argumentative?”, “Do I talk too loud?”, “Does my breath smell?”, or “Do I ever bore you when we’re together?”. In this way, your trusted friend will know that you are interested in self-improvement. Listen to their comments and criticisms. Don’t be overly sensitive or defensive. Wasn’t it you that asked for their opinion? Open up your mind and heart. In return, you may be given some insights to behaviors that you can change.
One of Whitney Houston’s songs says, “Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.” True enough. To be able to love others, you must first love yourself. You cannot give what you do not have. Before telling others about how to improve themselves, let them first see that you are a product of self-improvement. Self-improvement helps to inspire other people.
Stop thinking of yourself as being second-rate. Forget the haunting, repetitive thoughts of “If only I were richer… if only I were thinner” and so on. Accepting your true self is a big step towards self-improvement. Stop comparing yourself to others. Instead, compare your “old self” to your “new self.”
In conclusion, we all have insecurities. Nobody is perfect. Often, we may be tempted to wish for better things, better features, or better bodies. Life doesn’t need to be perfect for you to be happy with yourself. Self-improvement is the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we begin to feel more accomplished, contented and happy.